2253423728_fc073af8e3_z[1]It has never been easier to send chocolates and flowers on Valentine’s Day. A click and a few keyboarded numbers will do the job.

But how genuine and heartfelt is a gesture that involves so little real thought and effort? There’s a better way.

The suggestions below cost nothing and mean everything. They will bring the two of you closer together, because they show that you are paying attention and that you care. How many of these things can you do with the person you love?

1. Notice me.
2. Smile a lot.
3. Acknowledge me in company.
4. Use my name frequently.
5. Look for me in a crowded room.
6. Remember dates that are important to me.
7. Ask me about things going on in my life.
8. Look in my eyes when you talk to me.
9. Listen when I talk.
10. Be playful with me.
11. Take an interest in what I am reading and writing.
12. Be silly with me.
13. Be kind and gentle with me.
14. Say yes a lot.
15. Show that you remember feeling as I say I do.
16. Respect my boundaries.
17. Be honest.
18. Be yourself.
19. Listen to my stories.
20. Ask me questions to understand better.
21. Hug me.
22. Kiss me.
23. Cuddle me.
24. Show that you believe in me.
25. Pay attention to me.
26. Notice when I seem different.
27. Let me solve my own problems.
28. Explore the world with me.
29. Surprise me.
30. Stay with me when I’m afraid.
31. Listen when I’m sad.
32. Teach me how to please you.
33. Cook me a wonderful meal.
34. Share my triumphs.
35. Share my excitement.
36. Share your passions.
37. Send me a love letter.
38. Follow my lead at times.
39. Notice when I’m not there.
40. Say hello often via phone, text, or email.
41. Thank me for the good things I do.
42. Give me space when I ask for it.
43. Call my attention to news that interests me.
44. Answer my questions.
45. Talk with me about my goals and dreams.
46. Laugh at my jokes.
47. Be relaxed.
48. Show that you trust me.
49. Admire me.
50. Create traditions to observe with me.
51. Learn what I have to teach.
52. Let me learn from you.
53. Share your goals and dreams with me.
54. Keep me company at events that mean a lot to me.
55. Be nice to people who have been important to me.
56. Look with me for interests we can share.
57. Hold hands with me when we’re out walking.
58. Be willing to apologize.
59. Listen to my favorite music with me.
60. Keep your promises to me.
61. Wave and smile when we go our separate ways.
62. Keep my picture on your cell phone and at work.
63. Ask for my advice or my opinion.
64. Send me articles and tunes you think I might like.
65. Pay me compliments.
66. Notice what I do right.
67. Help me find win-win solutions when we disagree.
68. Give me your undivided attention when we talk.
69. Ask questions about my life and concerns.
70. Introduce me to people who are important to you.
71. Show me you love to be with me.
72. Let me tell you how I feel.
73. Respect my expertise.
74. Show excitement when you see me.
75. Tell me how you feel.
76. Honor my goals and aspirations.
77. Praise more; criticize less.
78. Be consistent.
79. Acknowledge your mistakes.
80. Show that you enjoy our time together.
81. Give me a special nickname.
82. Marvel once in a while at what I can do.
83. Show that you are proud of me.
84. Pamper me.
85. Unwind with me.
86. Dance with me.
87. Ask for my help sometimes.
88. Support and encourage me.
89. Applaud my successes.
90. Help me resolve our differences promptly.
91. Treat me like a member of your team.
92. Tell me stories about your life.
93. Believe in my good intentions.
94. Be flexible.
95. Celebrate my quirks.
96. See us as complementing each other.
97. Be willing to forgive me when I make mistakes.
98. Notice when I try to please you.
99. Give me help when I ask for it.
100. Give me feedback right away.
101. Include me in conversations with others.
102. Show respect for my opinions.
103. Join me in adventures.
104. Visit my workplace.
105. Help me learn new things.
106. Be gentle, patient, and caring when I’ve had a hard day.
107. Respect my choices.
108. Leave love notes in my sock drawer.
109. Be silly with me.
110. Hang out with me.
111. Make time for me.
112. Feed my creative spirit.
113. Accept me as I am.
114. Ask me how I am (don’t tell me).
115. Cheer my accomplishments.
116. Help me feel safe.
117. Support my efforts to help others.
118. Work with me on important tasks.
119. Believe what I say.
120. Stand with me on matters of principle.
121. Daydream with me.
122. Set goals with me.
123. Honor my preferences.
124. Make decisions with me.
125. Urge me onward when I speak of my goals.
126. Help me think big.
127. Celebrate our good times and our milestones.
128. Go places with me.
129. Welcome my suggestions.
130. Help me when I’m sick.
131. Record a message or a song for me.
132. Be sincere.
133. Tell me what you welcome and expect from me.
134. Share with me experiences that give you joy.
135. Dwell on the future, not the past.
136. Talk directly with me face to face.
137. Be spontaneous.
138. Expect my best but not perfection.
139. Empower me.
140. Love me.